By Annisa Chiraz
Love. It’s something we have yet to fully comprehend but still feel as though is an essential part of our lives. Or at least something we long for. Some people (the old me included) view love and emotions in general as something that makes a person weak. Well, you can view it in that way or you can see it as something that makes you human. By having the ability to love someone and to feel such a wide range of emotions, you get so many things in return, both positive and negative. Love may give you the feeling of jealousy, pain and heartache but it can also allow you to see the beauty in life, to get a sense of direction and maybe even to find meaning in it all.
It’s not that we are incapable of love, but rather we are scared to face it. Maybe we’re scared of the fact that we don’t know how we’ll act when we’re vulnerable or scared of the fact that with real joy, real pain may come as well. Whatever our fear is, most of the time it gets a hold of us and drives us away from the things that can truly make us happy. That being said, often times for the reason of fear, we fail to say all of these things we want to say to a specific person or maybe even to a number of people. Because of this, I decided to make a survey where people anonymously answered these two questions; “what was something you’ve always wanted to say to someone you love(d) but never did?” and “why did you choose not to say it?”. I made this survey with the hope that these people would feel enlightened because they received the chance to express those “unsaid words” and I made this article with the hope that maybe someone out there will change their mind and say these things to the person they’ve always wanted to say it to.
Reasons why people didn’t say “I love you”
Top writing: “what was something you’ve always wanted to say to someone you love(d) but never did?”
Bottom Writing: “why did you choose not to say it?”
Based on all of these results, you can see that most of the things that people wanted to say were positive. Not all, but most of them were. Some things said were the painful truth that the person may need to hear and some other were comforting words that would’ve been able to make the person feel delighted.
Love is a risk. Saying all of these things are a risk. Especially saying the well-known “I love you” to a person. Love may be one of the biggest risk you’ll ever have to take one day. But it’s a risk worth taking. Caring for someone, loving them, saying all of these things you’ve always wanted to say, these are all risks that are worth taking in your life. It’s a risk because often times you need to be the one that that jumps first (or make a move) and you might need to be the one that loves first as well. That’s a scary thing because at first you might need to do it alone. But that doesn’t necessarily mean that by the end of it you’ll be alone too. Truth is, if both people keeps on waiting then nothing is ever going to happen. Trust me. Because the person would always wait for the other person to make the first move and if neither of them makes it, both of them will merely end up in the same place they were during the beginning. So go ahead and jump and take the risk. If not, you’re going to have days where all you can think about are the “what-ifs”. So take that risk and find out about what can happen. Because honestly, one of the best things in life that can happen to you is when the person you love decides to love you back.
One of the reasons why I was scared of love was because of the fact that it was temporary. The thought that something may be here now, but it may not be in the future scares me a lot. Then I realized that most things, if not all, are temporary. Say for example, high school. It’s going to end one day and you’ll be moving on and going into college. But that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t feel happy during the time you’re here. Things eventually end and that’s perfectly okay, because that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t enjoy it while it’s still there. 3 years ago I found a saying which I still hold on to now and it said, “every song ends, but is that any reason not to enjoy the music?”.
I’m well aware that everything I’ve said here is easier said than done. I know that opening up your heart, trusting someone, and saying “I love you” or even a simple “I care about you” is difficult. I’m not saying that this whole thing about risk and love isn’t going to take time, because it will. What I am saying is that it’s something worth doing and it’s certainly something worth going through. You shouldn’t have to leave those words unsaid. Go on at your own pace and maybe one day when you’re ready even tell that person you care about that they mean a lot to you or whatever it is you’ve always wanted to say to them. I just hope that when that day comes, you’ll be the happiest version of yourself that you can possibly be. Because you’ve jumped. Because then you won’t have to think about all the “what-ifs”. Because maybe then you’ll find beauty, direction and meaning. Because maybe, just maybe, one of the greatest things in life happened to you and that person loves you back.
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